Naruto Goes To College
by nitsrak11
Summary: Naruto goes to college in our world. R


Just to let you know the bold was written by my cousin, who's sooo awesome! the non-bold regular normal boring print was written by me. we are not responsible for the loss of any brain cells during the reading of this story. enjoy.

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Karlysia awoke with a startle. The rain was pouring outside, hitting the cement with a pitter patter. The wind blew the branches against her window, and they thumped. She pulled back her covers and she hopped out of bed. It was early: 4:00am, but she had to get up early. **Quickly, she dressed in a jogging outfit. She had made a bet with her friend, Jason Dolley. He bet her one million dollars that she couldn't jog around Canada every morning at 4:30am for a week. Everyone around the world would jog next to her, cheering her on. They wanted her to win a million dollars and to beat Jason in a bet. Everyone hated Jason, except for Karlysia. True, he could get annoying. Like when he put so much gel in his hair. Sometimes his hair would be stuck flowing one way and the wind going the opposite way. Everyone was jealous of his perfect hair. **But truthfully, Karlysia was madly in love with Jason. She loved his perfect hair and everything. But she was completely determined to win this bet. Her life ambition was about to occur. But then she began to cry, and tears streamed from her eyes like the rain that had poured from the sky early that morning. She ran up to Jason and slapped him.

"How could you make me do such a bet? You know I hate running!" So she ran away back to America, and Jason followed her there. No literally, she RAN back to America. They decided to forget about that dumb bet and just go to see a movie. **After the movie, Jason asked if she wanted to go to Alaska, to go dog sledding. But she slapped him, and explained that she hated Alaska because it was too close to Canada. And ever since the bet, she had started to hate Canada. She said that they'd go to Rome instead. So they went. But when they got there, all the people of Rome had gone back to being Romans from the early times. They loved to fight. So when Jason and Karlysia got to Rome, there was a huge Roman army dressed in togas. They ran as fast as they could to Italy, where there were a ton of hot guys. Jason got really jealous. He thought that Karlysia would fall for one of those Italian hunks. So they left. **They decided to stop traveling, and chill at home for the next few months. Jason secretly liked Karlysia, and Karlysia secretly liked Jason, but both of them were so oblivious that they would never know. Jason was beginning to give up on his forbidden love to

Karlysia, so he decided to just go to the spectrum to see if he could find anyone else to give his heart to. He quickly applied some more gel to his blonde hair, and he drove off to the spectrum. As soon as he got there, he immediately spotted a really pretty girl, so he went up to her and said, "Hey girl hey! What's your name?" The girl just stared then said, "Oh ma gosh you're JD!!" She jumped up and down. She was with a big group of friends and they all were just like pshhhhhh. "I'm Karstin. Nice to meet you." **In Karstin's group of friends was one girl named Elysia. She rolled her eyes. "Jason, you suck!" She screamed as she ran away. "She thinks that you're stupid." Karstin told Jason. "Why?" He asked. "Don't know. Maybe she just hates you because she loves Edmund from Narnia more." Karstin replied. "But I wasn't ever in that movie nor have I ever met the boy who played Edmund." He said, very confused. "It's okay." Karstin reassured him, "Please forgive her. She was just released from an asylum for crazy people." Jason just stared at the girl who was continuing to run away from him. **"Oh," Jason replied, "That's ok, hehe." His eyebrows were furrowed in an awkward way. One of Karstin's friends socked Jason in the face, and he fell over backwards. "What did u do that for?" Jason asked as blood poured from his nose. "Oh Jason," Karstin shrieked, and gave him a hug. "Oh, I'm ok, don't worry about me, you pretty, pretty, girl." He said. At that moment Elysia came running back. Devon W. (Ned's declassified) appeared. He and Jason were best friends. Elysia was flipping out over Devon, and was hopping around him and squealing.

"Hey! I'm Devon, who are you?" Devon said. "Oh- hahahahahhahaahhahahha I'm Elysia. Wow I can't believe you are talking to ME!!" Elysia replied. Jason's nose was still pretty bloody, and Karstin was trying to clean it up, but it wasn't really working. The blood was just shooting out like a fountain. Elysia yelled, "Oh ma gosh, I LOVE blood!! She opened her mouth and all the blood squirted into her mouth. "Yummy!!" She squealed. Jason began to use it as a squirt gun and was squirting everyone with blood, and Elysia was trying to catch it with her mouth, Jason eventually stopped bleeding, and the four blood stained twins decided to go to the pool.** As the four enjoyed themselves in the pool, Jason's cell rang. "Hello?" He said answering his cell. After he hung up, he looked sadly at the Karstin, Elysia, and Elysia's new boyfriend, Devon. "Karlysia died." He said sadly. Karstin shrieked, "That's awkward and intense!!" "Oh ma gosh Jason. Your life is a soap opera!!" Elysia yelled in excitement. "Yeah, it is! Sweet!" Jason said in agreement. Jason quickly got over Karlysia's death, thanks to Elysia's comforting words. That night, the four went on a double-date to some Italian place. "Elysia? Are you over your obsession of the kid who played Edmund?" Devon asked his new girlfriend. Elysia was silent. "Maybe?" She finally answered. "YOU DON"T LOVE ME!!" Devon screamed as he ran out of the restaurant crying. "I guess this means we're not together anymore." Elysia said, "Oh well." **

But then Edmund walked in, and sat down next to Jason. "Oh hey man," Jason said, and the two slapped high fives. Elysia almost fainted. She was glad that she and Devon had just gotten over each other. "Hi Edmund, My name is Elysia. I'm single- what about you?" She gave him a dangerous looking grin, making him toss his head back and laugh- a hearty, solid laugh. "So- are you single," Elysia asked again.

"Not anymore," He said, and then grabbed Elysia's hand. Elysia almost could have fainted. Jason and Karstin laughed. "Oh Karstin," Jason said. "What immature fools, I mean seriously."

"Well I guess since they are together we might as well be!" Karstin yelled. The four giggled, and Edmund stared into Elysia's eyes. Elysia's lip twitched and Edmund grabbed Elysia's lip with his two fingers, and squinted his eyes. "What the heck?" Elysia said. He just kept staring at her lip. He kept pulling on it, until Elysia screamed at the top of her lungs. "Oww- that hurts? What the heckell are you doing Edmund?"

"Oh, just making sure your lip was secure," He nudged her. "Wooooooww," Jason said. **Suddenly, Karstin's phone rang. It was her mom, asking her to baby-sit Karstin's siblings. Elysia volunteered to help her. Edmund and Jason decided to walk the girls to their home. While they were walking to Karstin's house, a woman ran up to Elysia. In her hands, she had a baby. She shook it furiously in the air. "Down with the baby!" She screamed. Then she threw the baby at Elysia, who thankfully caught the poor baby. Then the woman ran off a nearby cliff. "Well, looks like you now have a baby, Elysia." Jason said smiling. The group continued to walk to the house, completely forgetting that the woman had just killed herself. When they got to Karstin's house, a limo was pulled up in front of her house. "Oo looks like Andrew's over!" Karstin said as they passed the limo and entered the house. Sure enough, in the kitchen was Andrew Homestead, super model. "Hey Andrew, how ya been?" Elysia asked the super model. "Good. I see you have a baby. Who's the lucky guy?" He asked. "Um, well this lady threw this baby at her before jumping off a cliff." Edmund explained to him. "Suuurrreee." Andrew said not believing Edmund and Elysia, "Like that ever happened."**

"Well, sorry Andrew, but we aren't going to stick around," Karstin said as she got back into the limo. Elysia and their boyfriends followed. They decided that maybe they should just go back to Elysia's house and relax for a bit. So, the limo dropped them off, and they went inside. "Uh-oh, crap what will my mom say when she finds out I am dating Edmund- and I just met him a few hours ago?" Elysia sighed. Elysia's mom, Elizabeth walked in. "OOO, who are these two FINE fellows?" She asked, and eyed Jason suspiciously. "hehehehe, well mom, this is my, my, boyfriend, Edmund!" Elysia exclaimed.

"Awww, well it is SO nice to meet you Ed!" Elizabeth said, "Well I think it would be best if I left you young kids alone. I am just such a nuisance." She trotted upstairs happily and squealed, "My baby has a BF!!" They decide to have some ice cream. Elysia opened the fridge, and pulled out chocolate and vanilla. Jason had a wild look in his eye. He was staring at the chocolate ice cream wildly. He ripped it out of Elysia's hands and started to pour it into his eyes. "Gee wiz- boy do love chocolate!!" He was going crazy. **Then his eyes began to burn like the sun. "Gee Jason, you look hot." Karstin exclaimed. Jason screamed in terror. "Oh, Jason, do you need anything?" Elysia asked him as he ran in circles while trying to clean his eyes from the chocolate. Then he stopped and looked at her. "Actually, I could use some chap stick. My lips are really chapped." "Oh, what flavor do you want? I have grapilious, smosh flavor, and four-tailed cat flavor." Karstin offered. "Umm. I think I'll use four-tailed cat flavor. That sounds awkward." Jason said taking the lipstick. After he put it on his sexy voluptuous lips, he exclaimed, "Wow Karstin, you're lip gloss is poppin!" Suddenly, Jason's face broke out in acne. "Acne-tize me captain." He said into a random video camera. It was then that Karstin, Elysia, and Edmund realized that they were in a movie. "I'm sorry, Jason." Said the movie director, "but movie stars don't get acne. You're fired!" Then the group left for Germany.**

"Well, actually, we aren't going to Germany," said Edmund, "We are actually just going to see Chris Brown!!" "Oh ma gawsh I love Chris Brown!!" Jason said. So, they went to Chris Brown at his house. They knocked on the big golden door, and Chris came out dressed in Low rise baggy blue jeans and a super tight white tank top that showed off his six pac, and his head was sparkling in the mist. They stepped into his giant house. The lights randomly dimmed, and Sylvester Stallone came out dressed in an ultra-short robe. "OOOO YAAAA" Said a random low voice. "What the heckell??" Karstin said. Sylvester Stallone started to do the G-slide, and he is giggling rapidly. Chris Brown soon joins in, and then Justin Timberlake joins in too. "No Justin, I'M bringing sexy back," said Edmund, and he shook his nag. Eventually everyone joined in the dancing- and it was a party!! **Then a four-tailed cat dragged itself across the floor. Jason picked up the strange animal. Its tail-leg things squirmed around crazily, as it tried to escape from Jason's death grip. Then Jason gave the cat, eh thing, to Karstin. "Fluffy! I've been looking for you for years." Karstin exclaimed. "How many years?" Elysia questioned. "Oh, only about a mealioin years." "dotdotdot" Edmund said aloud. "EAT ME!" Fluffy said, "I'm a taco!" Everyone left Chris Brown's hood and went back home. In like a couple days, Jason and Karstin got married. Edmund and Elysia got married and adopted the baby of the woman who jumped off the cliff. GROSS! THE END!  
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**OOOO YAAAA**

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please review. we care about your opinion about how dumb we are!

oooooooo yaaaaaa


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